20 Things I Wish I Knew Before I Started Traveling With Kids

A cherished memory: Sophia, Bella and Ben, standing on a rooftop in downtown Panama City, Panama, 2008.

Maybe I’m the kind of person who likes to learn things the hard way. As I look back on all the mistakes and misconceptions that plagued me years ago before I started traveling with my kids, I wish I knew then what I know now. I wouldn’t have wasted time fretting about inconsequential issues or feeling inadequate. It would have been easier and I would have started sooner.

Without further adieu, here’s a simple list of 20 things I wish I had known 10 years ago.

1. There is no better time than now. Hasn’t anyone told you that life goes by quickly? As it turns out, they’re not kidding.

2. Traveling with kids isn’t inherently dangerous. There is no virtue in staying housebound, nor is there virtue in travel. They are both perfectly fine lifestyle choices to make with pros and cons, risks and rewards. The only fault I see is when you’re doing one but wishing to do the other.

3. Be careful who you talk to. If you want break out of your rut and see the world with the kids, don’t ask timid parents their opinion. Seek out parents you’d like to emulate and fill your head with their encouraging words and advice. There is no purpose in bouncing an un-conventional idea off of a very conventional person. Don’t know any adventurous parents? Meet some here: www.familiesontheroad.com, http://www.soultravelers3.com/, http://www.travelwithyourkids.com/

4. When you have a child, you don’t join her life. She joins your life and, thusly, your vision for your family. Every kid is along for the ride, whether that means being planted in suburbia, a corn field in Indiana, or traveling around the U.S. in an RV. This is how it’s supposed to be.

5. You will never regret going. You will always regret staying.

6. Traveling with kids is not that hard. Just like riding in a car, they get used to it and adjust. Don’t allow the adjustment period (which can be difficult) scare you away.

7. Pack light, but pack smart. You don’t need to bring a mountain of diapers or anything else that can be purchased easily (unless you’re going to a remote place). You will learn that you need 25% of the things you think you need.

8. When flying, always bring a change of clothing for each person, yourself included. When kids spill or get sick, you’re usually the one sitting closest to them.

9. You do not need to rely on mind-numbing television or movies to keep kids happy while traveling. Allow your children to be entertained by engaging in the process of travel, and to use their minds as much as possible.

10. Care about what people think, but not too much. There is a difference between unruly, obnoxious behavior from a child and then the normal stuff that you just have to tolerate. Not everyone around you will know the difference, so just smile politely and wear a thick skin.

11. Take away all commercialized television from your home. Don’t let Corporate America teach your kids what a happy life looks like. That’s your job.

12. Attitudes are infectious. Stomp out bad moods as they appear by being overly optimistic, cheerful and helpful when one of you starts to lose it.

13. Do not pass on your phobias to your kids. Teach them to fear only the things they should. Think carefully about what those things should be.

14. Buy a Flip. This is the best travel device ever. (Don’t get a knock-off. They’re not as good.)

15. The best things to see and do will generally be the cheapest things. Avoid theme parks and petting zoos.

16. Be prepared for some major bonding time. Traveling forces you to be with one another, usually in tight quarters, and in uncommon situations. You will seriously get to know one another. This is a good thing.

17. Sell off most of your crap, whether you live in a house or not. Stuff ties you down, muddies your perspective and steals your time. Life is what happens when you’re not busy with material items (shopping for them, storing them, dusting them). Sell them online and then take a trip to Hawaii with the all the money from the proceeds.

18. If you’re planning an extended period of travel, start homeschooling now. Find the curriculum that suits you and your child so it won’t be a huge hassle later on.

19. Your kids are capable of more than you think. Our society has coddled children too much. To raise capable, independent children you need to expect more from them. Read FreeRangeKids.com for a new (old) way of raising kids.

20. Your children will remember the experiences they had with you and not the things you gave them. Don’t believe me? Think about your own cherished memories growing up. Do they involve Barbie Dolls or plastic trinkets? Give your kids some stories they can pass down to their kids.

Do you have something to add to the list? Let me know!

Tagged as: personal reflections, travel tips, websites I like